Rough day...
Well it was our final day at school and at the children's home today and it was not at all easy! I held it together at school fairly well only tearing up a couple times, one being when all of the kids were sobbing and running after our van as we drove off...never to see them again :( I think the hardest part for me is that I cannot say that I will see them again or don't worry we will meet again because we probably won't and I probably wont ever see them again. I hate that!
After leaving the kids at school it was then off to the children's home...I knew it wasn't going to be any easier..actually harder. Bianca lost it in my arms and I didn't let her good the whole time we were there. She never stopped sobbing and that is when I lost it. I though to myself...why do I have to be another person who leaves her...why do I have to be another person who she has to say goodbye to...IT JUST PLAIN SUCKS!
Bianca is a girl who doesn't have a mother or father in her life...she doesn't even live with any blood family members...she is one of the only kids in the home that doesn't have a sibling living there and she has been left by WAY too many people. If you haven't read any of my other blogs, she has called me her mom since the beginning and I have practically adopted her as my own. It is sooo hard to leave her and no matter how much I told her that I promise to write and I'll NEVER forget her...nothing helped her pain. I prayed for her and hugged her close for a long time. Then....I had to leave her...I had to leave her crying in the doorway of the children's home...it was one of the WORST feelings ever!
I can't say much more...just that good byes...they really suck...
AND...I still have so much to process...
Video of some of my grade 3 learners singing a good bye song to me. :(
Chitoka and De'loris
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